This is so great.
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just painted an onion on a cutting board and i think it’s the peak of my artistic career
This is giving me emotions that I myself do not fully understand
Maybe you're just tearing up because someone has been cutting onions
If you work a tipped job literally make up a silly name for yourself and people will think you’re so much more charismatic and personable for the exact same service. People are soo much nicer and tip me better when I say my names Melon. They fucking love it all I gotta say is yup that’s my real name. my parents are huge hippies. I know fucking insane right. Fucking stupid. With a straight face and especially the old people they have to fan themselves they get so excited
"Credit to the original artist" is not credit to the original artist
"Payment to the cashier", I say, as I haul a TV out the door of the Walmart








